Campfire Blog

NYC Mayor Bloomberg to Ban Sale of All Sodas Over 16oz

Can he just fess up and call himself a radical leftist already?

Bloomberg Bloomberg Bloomberg. I see you coming from a mile away. I know the game. Inch by inch, right? Ban large sodas. Then ban all sodas. Then tell people how much alcohol they can drink. Then take away all alcohol. Then tell people what they can eat. Then tell them how much.

This is scary stuff, folks. I had a friend tell me that it’s arbitrary to single out soda when you have all-you-can-eat buffets everywhere. False.

It seems arbitrary but it isn’t. It’s all about establishing a legislative precedent. It’s about choosing the right topic. In this case, it’s soda because it’s become an easy target of late. No one is going to stand up and defend the benefits of soda. But before you know it, Michael Bloomberg has the authority to limit the amount of squares of toilet paper you can use. But mark my words, if that dark day comes, I will be the first to stand up and defend the benefits of toilet paper freedom. USA! USA! USA!

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